Guam Department of Revenue and Taxation

Once upon a time, in the mystical land of Guam, there existed a legendary place known as the Department of Revenue and Taxation. The mere mention of its name would send shivers down the spines of the brave souls who dared to venture into its bureaucratic labyrinth.

Our protagonist, a determined individual with the patience of a saint, embarked on a noble quest to visit the Department of Revenue and Taxation. Armed with a backpack filled with snacks, a novel that spanned a thousand pages, and a flask of coffee that never seemed to run dry, they set out on their epic journey.

Days turned into weeks, and weeks into months, as our protagonist navigated the winding queues that snaked through the department's waiting area. Each day brought new hope, as they watched the numbers on the LED display slowly crawl towards their own. But alas, it seemed as if time itself had slowed within those hallowed walls.

As seasons changed and years passed, our protagonist became a fixture within the Department of Revenue and Taxation, as familiar to the staff as the chairs they occupied. They witnessed countless others come and go, some grizzled veterans who had been waiting for what felt like a lifetime, and others who had only just begun their odyssey.

Friends and family expressed concern, wondering if our protagonist had perhaps stumbled upon a wormhole that defied the laws of time. They joked that they might see them again when they were old and gray, their grandchildren in tow, still clutching that dog-eared novel.

And so, our protagonist's tale became a local legend, whispered in hushed tones around the island. Rumor had it that they had achieved a zen-like state of tranquility, immune to the passage of time, as they continued their noble wait for a glimpse of a tax form or a nod from an overworked clerk.

And as the years rolled on, the people of Guam would occasionally catch a glimpse of our protagonist, sitting in the Department of Revenue and Taxation, still sipping coffee and turning the pages of that same novel. Some claimed to have seen a subtle smile playing at the corners of their lips, a smile that seemed to say, "One day, my friends, one day, I shall emerge victorious from this bureaucratic abyss."

And so, dear reader, it is said that our protagonist's noble quest continues, an epic saga of patience and determination that may very well span the ages. As you walk past the Guam Department of Revenue and Taxation, spare a thought for our valiant hero, for they serve as a testament to the indomitable spirit of those who dare to challenge the most formidable of bureaucratic foes.

I am pondering on how to start this review of the ridiculousness of the business practices that is currently being ran at the Guam DMV. This is what I have personally experienced and what I have seen going on with this establishment.

Firstly, I don't hold all the blame on the uneducated and unhappy employees that are currently working there. When you walk in, you can clearly tell that most of them do not want to be there in the fist place, and maybe that is why they will give you death glares, have bad attitudes, and spit out conflicting and wrong answers. So, I don't blame the disgruntled employees, I black the dickheads and the duschebags that makes up these outrageous policies that they are upholding.

I went to the DMV to switch over my license from the the states to Guam's. I stood in line for three hours and 13 minutes only to get turned away for not having my original social security card with on me. Who the hell carries their SS card on their persons in the first place? I presented the woman with every other piece of documents that proves who I am, but no, "there is no way around that Sir". "We must have your original SS card to prove who you are Sir".

My birth certificate, U.S. citizenship documents, my DD214, my passport all have the same information on them, will not hold up. I asked her why can't you use these documents to verify who I am, and she told me "Sir, we have moved away from accepting birth certificates because it cannot prove who you really are, only an SS card can do that".

I told her I just applied to get a replacement SS card, and I can't be back for another couple of months to get my Guam's DL, and she said "oh no Sir, it only takes a few weeks to get your new one, and then you can come back when it gets here". I told her, the nature of my job, won't allow me to just come back when I wish, which will push me past the 30 day rule. Her final solution was "Sir, then maybe don't drive until then".

Wow, really? I mean what the fuck is that kind of answer. I then bid her a good day, and left.

Maybe this is the reasons why we have so many pissed off customers, the kind of shit that is being told to customers. If there would be an option to give a negative 30 starts for a review of this establishment, be sure it would have been rated as such.

To the people who makes up these stupid policies, I say to you...Fuck off, and choke on a big fat hairy one and leave office. Good day!

There could be a worse place to be..... maybe Deparment of Corrections. Avoid if you can. If not bring antibacterial gel, pen, entertainment and comfortable clothing. You may be there a while.

KUDOS to Carmen Gumataotao at Collections for her demonstration of how customer service is essential to providing an delightful experience in an environment known to be frustratingly challenged.
Her pleasant demeanor was not expected at a government agency notorious for their lack of empathy towards the constituents that pay their salaries. However Carmen was not only thorough in in her job description, but went beyond it to discover an erroneous FTF penalty of $1600 I was assessed for lack of due diligence by the agency's staff. After our business at hand she also walked us to the right personnel who could help us with the unfriendly user PAY GUAM online app. Carmen, and am sure, many like her are the unsung heroes of this inefficient bureaucracy.

Just got to the island and had my car shipped here. Took the necessary paperwork to the DMV at 8am. Line was long outside but when they opened 3min late we all went in within minutes. I had to go to the registration line. Was 15th in line but got seen in ten minutes. Next went to the cashier to pay and was 5th in line. Was done in 5 minutes then took the receipt back to the same receptionist at registration (automatic head of line for this). She gave me my paperwork which was waiting for me and I was done! Was in and out in 28 minutes. I was friendly so every one I dealt with was very friendly back.
I had a great experience, but I went for registration reasons. If you go for ID's then the line is long and barely moves because locals with disabilities (and there is a lot) gets head of line privileges. My friends said that for ID's it's best to go right before it closes. Line moves faster then because no one comes in to cut for the ahead of line privileges.

I stood in line for 2 hours, 8 months pregnant to get a license. The person helping me didn't seem to want to be there and claims to have to gather all my personal information for some "real ID act." While waiting all that time in line there's a ton of signs, one which explains why there is such poor driving practices here. They don't do behind the wheel testing for those who are first time license drivers. My advice would be to bring water and maybe a snack, an empty bladder cause their restrooms are disgusting! Don't expect much and if you could have someone with you because you will have to jump to another line to pay after already spending half your life in the initial line. This place should be ashamed of the way the operate! The worst DMV experience ever!