Expectations

Expectation is a belief that is centered on the future, it may or may not be realistic. Expectations are positive in nature but the resultant effect could be disadvantageous

In life, without expectation you might not be able to get to some certain level. Expectation is a family of vision, for you to get to some certain point in life, you might have to picture yourself there but you have to consciously and unconsciously set boundaries so your expectations don't end up unrealistic.
When I was in 200level in the University, I was taking a course titled behavioural modification, as the lecturer was teaching us, I envisioned myself have a counselling clinic and modifying abnormal behaviors. From that instance, I decided I was going to practice as a counselling psychologist.
I envisioned this 2011 and 9 years later 2019 this vision begin to manifest. I started practice formerly, registered my counselling business , had a masters degree which is the qualification required to practice but what I envisioned then is not exactly what is happening now.

I had an expectation which motivated me to this point but imagine my expectation was to start a full practice with my own property and finance at the age of 23, what do you think might have happened to me if I was unable to achieve that? I bet it, I would have been frustrated, dissapointed and anxiety might even set in which might lead me to making desperate decisions.
So many of you have a record of 1 or 2 heart breaks 😄 because you had an unrealistic expectation about life that motivated you to date the first or second person that dissapointed you.

I want you to think for a second, your present expectation about life, do you think they are realistic?

Alexander Pope says "Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.”

It is always good to expect but like I said, it has to be on check, you have to set boundaries so as not to feel dissapointed. You might not be dissapointed not expecting anything but the absence of expectation could also cause frustration and no sense of direction in life. Unrealistic expectation can lead to disappointment, depression and anxiety when our expectations are not meant
1. At the right time
2. Through the means we already programmed in our head and
3. If the result of what we expected is way below what we want

Have it at the back of your mind that life is not one way, failure is a part of life, don't expect all your plans to work out exactly as you expected.

You want to earn 6 digit at 22, get a car at 23, buy a house at 24, get married to the love of your life at 26, If you don't want to end up hurt and dissapointed have a plan b for your expectations and that is the best way to set a boundary, so your expectations does not become unrealistic.
For example your plan b might be; If I don't get a 6 digit job at 22 I will strive to at least get a 5 digit job to sustain till I have the experience and connection to get a 6 digit.
I'm not saying be negative but in all sincerity positivity most of the time is birthed from negativity.

In conclusion

Don’t stop expecting
Don’t beat yourself too much when your expectations are not met, it’s just a phase of your life not the end of it.

By Nihinlola Eunice Olowe

Counselling psychologist

+2348160435297