I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say that I think this marriage is probably not in a very good place.

Am I right or am I right?

I think I’m right!

And now it’s up to you to see if you think this guy is a total a**hole for what he said to his wife.

Let’s take a look, shall we?

AITA for telling my wife to stop being a pushover or I would take away her spending privileges?

“My wife(25F) of 5 years has a sister(20F). She’s somewhat disabled, and while this may sound contradictory she has a condition which makes working difficult but not entirely impossible unless she is under stress (neurological condition, loses muscle control, makes her hit/throw stuff, fall over).

I have no problem with her sister. She is sweet and nice to have around, my wife loves her more than anything. She basically raised her and stepped in when her parents wouldn’t or couldn’t. This has led to a relationship closer to mother daughter. My wife would constantly be paying for stuff for her sister, and this made sense to me when she was a minor and was doing much worse health wise.

Recently though this has increasingly been getting under my skin. I am the sole provider for my household right now since my wife was pregnant, and only gave birth recently. We’d spend a lot to buy her sister gifts for holidays, which she would never return the favor – even with something cheap with thought (or no thought) put into them. We’d always take her out to events or dinner and pay for her every time. She would never even pick up the bill for herself.

Again, wasn’t entirely an issue until she became an adult – and now I’m fed up with it. She expects my sister to do things like pay for her to go to the doctor, or invites us out to lunch and then expects us to pay. She doesn’t even schedule her own appointments, my wife takes her wherever she asks even if she has the ability to do it herself and we live 45 minutes away.

She always talks about how she’s freelancing and is making money, but then somehow has no money whenever she needs or wants anything.

I did not have an issue with this either really. I thought my wife was being a pushover, but it’s ultimately her money. Until recently. Now she’s spending my money on her and it’s really getting me angry. I want to spend my money on my daughter but we’re spending money on this financially irresponsible leech.

I explained this to my wife in a much nicer way, but we ended up in a fight where I called her sister some pretty messed up things. I ended the conversation by telling her I would take away her access to our joint bank account until she contributes again if she doesn’t tell her sister to grow up and that she is not her mother, and she is no longer a child.

She cannot be dependent on people forever. I think it’s an important lesson for her to learn. If she doesn’t learn it, she can get back to work and continue supporting her until shes 40 with her own money. Not mine.

She honestly thinks this is an end of the world situation, I think it’s quite clear this is for the better. I think she’s scared of hurting her sister but at this point shes crippling her by allowing her to do nothing.”

Here’s what folks had to say about this on Reddit.

This person said everyone sucks in this situation.

Another Reddit user also said everyone sucks here but this guy’s ideas about money are pretty concerning…

And one individual said this guy sounds pretty controlling.

What is this, 1950?