The Patriotic Dessert Trend That Sadly Never Took Off

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It's hard to show up a flag cake. Other tri-colored 4th of July desserts have tried to take its place—c'mon white chocolate strawberries with blue glitter, you never had a chance—but flag cake reigns supreme, something we can all agree on in this divided time. In the deep corners of a little place called Pinterest, where I like to go to escape the horrors of reality (or work), I found another 4th of July-themed dessert that never quite took off. And to be honest, I'm shocked.

Eagle cake!!!

Hello, doesn't our national bird deserve more love on this, the sacred day of fireworks and barbecue?!

Here are some eagle desserts (and one cheese ball) that didn't take off as the food trend they aspired to be. Maybe it was the slightly phallic cashew nose—I dunno. But I'm still holding out hope.

Eagle Cookies

Who needs wings when you're already soaring?

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Scowling Eagle Cupcakes

They'll show YOU who's endangered.

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Eagle Heads-on-Spikes Brownies

"Avenge me!!!"

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More Eagle Snacks

In case you were wondering what a dessert mugshot looks like.

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Eagle Ice Cream Cone

Somebody put these guys on a $100 BILL.

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Goldfish-Nose Eagle Head Marshmallows

These eagles have seen things no eagle should see.

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Eagle Cheese Ball

Strap a helmet on this and take it for a ride down Route 66 on your Harley, because it doesn't get more patriotic than a cheese ball-d eagle.

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Or keep it more classic Americana with deep dish apple pie: