We’ve all experienced that conversational moment when we're sharing something interesting, only to be cut off by someone else with something to say. It’s rude, impolite and frustrating at best.
Why do people feel free to interrupt others who are speaking? Better yet, why are we the ones being interrupted?
Many people believe those who frequently interrupt are simply unaware that their behavior is rude or inconsiderate. Some studies show that people's personal style of listening and communicating creates unintentional behavior. As professionals, we must examine the weakness within our own communication skills and admit when we are the problem.
If we want to have influence at home or in the workplace, we must communicate in a way that draws in our listeners. Doing so will hopefully impact them enough to willingly act upon what we have to say. If you find yourself being frequently interrupted, you are not as influential as you think.
Here are eight reasons why speakers are interrupted and how you can fine-tune your skills to speak with greater influence and impact:
1. Get to the point. Listeners will quickly grow impatient if you meander in conversation, ramble, or fail to make a quick point. You may think you are adding context to the topic, but in fact, you've lost your listeners’ interest. You are more likely to confuse your listeners by saying too much. When their patience runs out, they interrupt to get from you the information they need. It's their way of fast-forwarding the conversation. Be clear and concise in your message.
2. Focus your passion. When a topic excites us, we want to share it with the world. As a result, we overshare everything we know about it, mistakenly believing our listeners will be equally as interested. This is rarely true. It’s OK to share your passion and excitement, just keep your message direct. Let them see your enthusiasm without oversharing irrelevant details.
3. Exude confidence. People are less likely to interrupt someone they perceive as important or confident. When you speak, maintain a strong posture. Keep your shoulders back, head and eyes up, and remain in a neutral stance. Allow your voice to resonate from your diaphragm to project strength and power. Connect with your listeners’ eyes. Keep them engaged in your words rather than just hearing them.
4. Share the floor. Sometimes, our listeners interrupt because they can't get a word in edgewise. If you are speaking continuously without giving others an opportunity to share, they will likely cut in and take over. Instead, pause to listen and give others an opportunity to speak. Influential communicators know the persuasion doesn’t come from speaking rather listening.
5. Presume positivity. Interrupters often don't realize their inconsiderate habit. If you are cut off mid-thought by a habitual interrupter, remain positive and in control. Reengage in conversation with confidence, refraining from showing irritation or frustration in your words or body language. By staying positive, the conversation can get back on track without changing the dynamics of the interaction.
6. Resist the urge to shut down. Interruptions can often leave us feeling embarrassed or unimportant. In those moments, it’s tempting to shut down, become defensive or stop speaking entirely. Instead, remain open and considerate of the interrupter. Allow them to finish their thought before interjecting yours. Avoid negative body language that reflects disapproval of their actions.
7. View the interruption as a way to improve. Instead of being offended, consider someone's interruption as a reminder to get to the point. It provides you an opportunity to get back on point and shift your message to meet the listeners’ needs. Afterward, take a moment to reflect on the conversation and consider how you could have adjusted your message to prevent the interruption.
8. Seek feedback. When you find yourself constantly interrupted by others, it's time to find out why. Find someone you trust to give you honest feedback. Create a plan that addresses each issue they share. Continually seek their input to ensure you're on the right track.
Take ownership and responsibility for being interrupted. Identify the communication skills that need improving. This way, what you say creates a bigger impact that influences listeners to tune in and act upon what you have to say.
