Have you been asking yourself the question – does he care about me? It’s fairly easy to decipher the intentions behind a guy if you know where to look.
Back in the day, if a guy called you and threw his arm around you while walking down the street, you knew he cared about you. Nowadays, it’s much harder to tell if a guy is into you and cares or if he’s just being nice to get some action. If you’re left wondering, does he care about me, maybe he’s just a nice guy, maybe he’s just using you, or maybe *hopefully* he truly cares about you.
Knowing if a guy cares about you or not all comes down to body language. Don’t just take his words into account, you also need to observe if his words match his actions. This is honestly the best way to answer the question – does he care about me? People have become more and more cryptic in the ways they show they care.
Truth be told, some people also do certain things to make you think they care when they don’t give a crap about you. So if he’s trying to say and show you something, not just with his words but his actions as well, believe him for it instead of assuming it’s something else.
[Read: 25 signs he truly loves you even if he doesn’t say it out loud]
Manipulative guys ruined it for the good ones
Let’s be real here. Before guys figured out that they could just pretend to be nice in order to get with a girl, it was way easier to tell the good from the bad. Now, ladies look at a kind, sweet guy and think, “he must just be faking it,” because of how many times we’ve run into the manipulative types.
This is the sad and unfortunate truth of the matter. We doubt every guy’s intentions because we’ve once been fooled by the fake sweet guy that seemed too good to be true. So now, we overthink and ask ourselves, does he care about me or is he just faking it all?
Those guys who toyed with our feelings and made us think they cared ruined it for all the genuinely nice and good guys out there. Instead of being happy that a guy shows kindness and care, we’ve become skeptical.
We decipher what their actions and words mean because, for all we know, we’re getting fooled again. [Read: 15 signs he just wants sex and is using you for his enjoyment]
Does he care about you, or is he playing you?
It might look easy as pie to know whether he cares about you or not, but so many girls get fooled thinking they already know a guy’s intentions for them.
Listen, when a guy is playing you, you should be able to feel it in your gut. It’s the voice in your head telling you whether to stay or run away.
If he’s playing you, his actions will never match his words. Or, you probably feel like he’s trying too hard at the beginning just to get what he wants.
In comparison to a guy that’s actually genuine about his intentions, a genuine guy will be patient with you. He won’t try to rush things with you or make you uncomfortable.
He’ll want to make you happy, but not in a way that’s forced and scripted. You can tell his intentions by how selfless and generous he is with you. A guy playing you won’t even attempt to go out of his way for you at all. [Read: Is he leading you on? 16 definitely signs he’s just playing you for fun]
Does he care about me? The honest signs you need to look for
Determining whether a guy actually cares about you, or if he’s just playing the gentleman part to get a little something from you can be really hard.
If you’ve found yourself with a seemingly good guy and keep asking yourself, “does he care about me?”—you’re in the right place. These different ways show you if a guy actually cares about you.
Remember these clues, and you’ll be able to weed out the manipulators from the truly great guys out there instantly!
1. He listens and offers advice
This is going to be a hard one to really figure out. Many guys perfect pretending to listen while not actually being engrossed in the conversation or your concerns at all. But you’ll be able to tell if he cares about you by how invested and engaged he is in the conversation.
The trick is to see if he gives you any advice. If he actually offers realistic solutions to your problems, then he really pays attention. He actually wants to make things better for you. This shows he cares. But if not, he’ll act indifferent throughout the conversation, or worse, he’ll try to change the topic! [Read: Do men have feelings? Why do they act like they just don’t care?]
2. He remembers the seemingly unimportant things
Not every guy is going to remember you can’t stand cold pizza and warm it up for you before even serving it. If he remembers the little things you didn’t even realize were important to you, then he really cares.
A guy may not tell you he likes you, but he’ll show he cares with the most ordinary gestures, no matter how mundane it is.
Maybe it’s making your coffee just the way you like it or opening doors for you just because. Remember, actions will always speak volumes if you’re asking, does he care about me?
3. He gets excited when you are
This is really easy to tell, especially if a guy cares about you. If you’re really amped about a job you applied for or a promotion, and he gets just as excited as you, he cares. When your happiness becomes his, that’s when you know he cares for real.
If your successes, accomplishments, and happiness are things he celebrates with you, he definitely cares about you and your future. [Read: Does he or doesn’t he? 30 guaranteed signs he really likes you]
4. He comes to you for advice
Guys aren’t really the type to seek out advice. Most of them just want to deal with things on their own. That being said, if your guy is seeking out your opinion and advice, he really cares about you and what you have to say.
He respects your thoughts, ideas, and opinions about things. He might even think you have the wisdom to help him out of a sticky spot. Now, why would he believe that unless he really cares about you, and values you and your opinions? [Read: How to be a high-value woman he respects and never wants to leave]
5. When you seem distraught, he cancels plans to help you
There are times when ladies break down. We can’t deal with something, and we sort of freak out. If your guy sees this and cancels whatever plans he has—unless it’s something very important like life or death scenarios—then he cares.
Watch the way he behaves when you’re very upset – does he drop everything and sacrifice his original plans to support you in times of need, or does he use an excuse to slip away *after suggesting you meet your friends*?[Read: The 20 qualities in a guy that make him a really good man]
6. He introduces you to his friends and family
Friends and family are actually essential to guys. If he feels you’re ready to step in and meet the most important people in his life, you are now one of the most important people in his life as well.
This is a strong indicator if you’re asking the question, does he care about me? A guy will never introduce you to anyone in his inner circle if he doesn’t care about you. So if he does, you must be very special to him! [Read: 15 signs he wants a serious relationship with you & truly loves you]
7. He uses “we”
When he talks about you two together, instead of saying things like “you and me,” or “I,” he uses the word “we.” He cares.
When he starts seeing the two of you as a unit and subconsciously starts vocalizing you as such, he proves just how much he cares. This simple switch of word usage might feel ordinary to you, but this is everything for a guy.
8. He asks about your day and actually pays attention
Asking about someone’s day is kind of something we do out of habit. “Hi, honey, how was your day?” Then we go on with a different discussion. But if he’s asking questions and showing concern about certain things that happened, he truly cares.
If he asks you about your meeting that day, or whether you were still arguing with your friend *an issue from a few days ago*, that’s genuine care right there. [Read: 14 clear signs he genuinely likes being around you]
9. He tries to fix things after a fight
Some guys get into an argument with you and then disappear without even caring to make it better. If he’s trying to talk things out with you and come to a solution, he really cares about you and your relationship.
If he’s the type to sit down and discuss even the hard things with you, he cares about building something real with you. He doesn’t want you to resent him or be angry at him any more than you probably are.
On the other hand, if a guy doesn’t really care, he’ll just slip away for a day or two to give you time to cool off. [Read: How to make him feel guilty for ignoring you and take back the power]
10. He makes an effort with your family and friends
If you’re asking, does he care about me, watch how he makes an effort with your friends and family. Does he try to adjust and fit in within your group? Does he open up about his life? Or maybe he tries to impress them or makes them laugh?
He obviously cares if he’s trying to please, and behave well in front of people that care about you. If he invites himself to your family functions and makes a point to get to know your friends, he definitely cares about you. [Read: Relationship rules – 30 must-know tips to live your best love life!]
11. He sacrifices his own happiness for yours
This isn’t to say that he makes you his pride and joy and forgets about anything he likes or makes him happy. This is to say that if he isn’t super thrilled to go see a particular movie but you’re dying to, he goes anyways.
Doing things like that shows a guy cares about you. He goes out of his way to make you happy, and that’s a concrete sign he cares deeply about you. Actions speak louder than words, remember?
12. He’s very understanding
Guys who care about you are going to take the time to understand where it is you’re coming from. Even if they think you’re being unreasonable *even a little crazy*, they sit and talk with you until they get what it is that’s bothering you. A guy who does this is genuinely caring.
He tries to see things from your point of view, even when he doesn’t exactly understand what the fuss is about. Whether it’s about a misunderstanding or simply trying to understand your perspective, he sees where you’re coming from. [Read: 13 things a boyfriend should do if he wants to prove his worth]
13. He doesn’t lie—even if it’ll hurt you
No matter what, he’s honest with you. Someone who really cares doesn’t lie just because he knows the truth with hurt. He tells the truth because he knows he must if he wants a successful relationship, and lies hurt worse in the long run.
If you’re wondering, does he care about me, look for signs he wants to build an honest relationship with you, that’s your answer. He does his best to be real with you right from the start for you, all in the hope that you’ll learn to trust him. [Read: The truly honest signs he wants a committed relationship with you]
14. He’s not possessive
Many people—especially young girls—have a habit of thinking possessive behavior means they care about you a lot. This is not right. A guy who cares about you wants you to have your freedom. He’ll want you to go out and have fun. He won’t hold you back.
So as much as he cares about you, he shouldn’t be controlling you and especially not manipulating you to turn things in his favor. If he cares about you, he lets you be your own person. [Read: 15 subtle signs of a controlling boyfriend]
15. He’s not selfish in the bedroom
This is a huge one. Even if he seems all sweet and kind outside of the bedroom, if he doesn’t care about you getting off, he doesn’t care much at all. Sex is essential in a relationship.
It’s definitely a time to see just how much someone cares for you. If he works just as hard for you as you do for him—if not harder—then he really cares. [Read: 34 passionate signs he’s making love to you and not just having sex]
16. He makes plans with you
If he makes long term plans with you, this is a big answer for the question – does he care about me? Guys aren’t the biggest plan makers when it comes to people they don’t care about, or see much potential in.
So if he makes weekend plans with you or even invites you to his sister’s wedding a month from now, you must mean a lot to him!
17. He tries to be better for you
If a guy doesn’t care about you all that much, he won’t even bother to improve for you. He’ll be content in his ways and won’t care if something about his behavior bothers you or not. But a guy who cares gets motivated to improve and work on himself if he wants to prove himself to you.
When he becomes self-aware of his flaws and weaknesses and tries to improve on those shortcomings, he cares about being better – both for himself and you. [Read: Why won’t he change? Your man says he will but never does]
18. He sees you as an equal
You’d be surprised how many guys actually don’t see a girl they’re dating as an equal. But honestly, a guy who cares about you should respect your opinions, beliefs, and values.
If your boyfriend cares, he’d value everything you say because he doesn’t think he’s above or superior to you. You’re a team, and that’s one of the powerful signs to answer the question – does he care about me? [Read: 15 rules to be a good partner in a relationship & wow your lover]
19. He attends to your needs
A guy who cares about you is a guy who wants to fulfill your needs the best way he can. You never have to beg for the bare minimum when he cares about you.
He naturally gives it to you because he wants to make you feel appreciated and cared for, even in mundane ways. He doesn’t see it as a chore to provide for your needs, but he loves doing it because, well, it’s you.
20. He checks in regularly
It doesn’t matter if he’s busy that day, but he’ll find the time to check in with you. Even if it’s just a short phone call or a quick text, he’ll be sure to let you know he’s thinking of you and is genuinely curious about how you’re doing. That’s a guy who cares. He doesn’t just settle for flowery words, but he’ll match those words with the right set of actions.
[Read: 18 signs a man is emotionally attached to you & ready to get closer]
Does he really care about you?
Well, the answer should be pretty obvious with all the signs above.
If he does the majority of these things and more, he cares deeply for you.
Remember to not just believe every word that comes out of his mouth, but pay attention to his actions and body language. Together, they should all match his intentions.
Asking yourself, does he care about me or is he just faking it all, can be hard to decipher. But with the concrete signs above, you should have a little more clarity on the matter.
