Scots retiree told ‘you’re dead’ by pals after ex-wife put his name on a gravestone to save cash
A STUNNED pensioner told how he’d been wondering why no one had phoned him for ages — until he discovered his ex had put his name on a headstone.
Alan Hattel, 75, had to assure pals he hadn’t popped his clogs after word got round about his plot in the local cemetery.
The retired welder was left reeling after finding out missus Berta, 62 — who he’s been estranged from for 26 years - had secretly bought the joint lair and memorial and had their names etched on it to save their two children money.
Fuming Alan said: “I’ve never said I want to be laid to rest alongside her.
“In fact, don’t even want to be buried — I plan to be cremated.
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“We’ve been separated 26 years and there is no animosity but I’m struggling to take it all in.
“I found out through word of mouth. Somebody saw the stone and told me.
“I thought they were winding me up but found out they weren’t taking the mickey when I went up to see it.
“I hadn’t had a phonecall for months. Now I think I know why. It’s causing a lot of disruption because I’ve got to let people know that I’m still alive.”
Alan and Berta’s names are both inscribed on the grave in Forfar’s Newmonthill Cemetery.
It’s understood the stone was placed by his family with the intention of the couple being buried together.
But Alan, who lives nearby, insists Berta and daughters Collette, 33, and Lynn, 31, didn’t run the idea past him.
He said: “I wasn’t happy about seeing my grave and finding out people think I’m dead. It has caused a family rift. People are asking if there was any malice in it but there wasn’t.
“It’s their way of saving money but they didn’t ask if they could put my name on it. If they’d asked me you can imagine what I’d have said.
“My ex who put it up isn’t happy. But I have a lot of mates buried up there and their families are going to their graves and seeing mine in the middle of them — it’s just not right.”
The Newcastle-born OAP admitted he is now beginning to see the funny side after getting pelters in his local boozer.
He said: “When I walk in the door of the pub the regulars say, ‘You’re dead’.
“I have a sense of humour so I reply, ‘Aye, well, I’m entitled to come down for a pint now and again’.
“But on the first day they thought I was dead three women looked at me and thought they’d seen a ghost.”
Asked if he was tempted to put down flowers at his headstone, Alan replied: “Are you joking? I was going to cover it up with a Newcastle United shirt.”
Daughter Collette, of Forfar, declined to comment when approached.
But she hit out on social media at Alan and backed her mum.
Collette said: “People only try to do good in life for others and this is what he does. Let’s hope he has everything sorted in his life because I’m done — I’ll not be sticking around to help.
“Mum paid for it in advance to save costs on her children later on. I’ll back my mum all the way.
“Some people just don’t appreciate anything. He hasn’t considered his family’s thoughts or feelings at all.
“She thought she was doing the right thing. Lesson learned — do nothing for him from now on.”
Collette answered the door at Berta’s house in the town.
She said: “My mum doesn’t want to comment.”
An Angus Council spokesman said: “It’s a confidential matter.”
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