How to Get Alimony

In many states, the term "alimony" has been replaced by "spousal support" or “maintenance” when referring to money paid to a former spouse. The types of alimony available and criteria for qualifying will differ from state to state. Nevertheless, the general process for getting alimony is the same.

Part 1
Part 1 of 4:

Understanding Alimony

  1. Step 1 Understand the purposes of alimony.
    Alimony has several purposes. One is to enable the spouse to live a lifestyle to which he or she has become accustomed. Other purposes include rehabilitating the spouse, so that they can support themselves now that the marriage has ended, and to reward the spouse, for sacrifices made during the marriage.
    • Alimony is not a reward for surviving a difficult marriage or a means to punish a spouse for bad behavior (such as an affair).[1]
    • Alimony is also not child support. The rationale behind child support is that a parent is financially responsible for his or her children even if the children do not live with that parent. Admittedly, an ex-spouse may financially benefit from child support if the children live with them. But the purpose is to allow the children to share in the lifestyle of the non-custodial parent, and child support amounts will be calculated with that end in mind.
  2. Step 2 Understand the different kinds of alimony.
    Because alimony serves different purposes, there are different forms of alimony. The most common are:
    • Temporary support. A spouse may receive temporary alimony during a divorce, annulment, or legal separation.[2] The ordered alimony is often calculated according to local rules and is less complex than a final order of alimony. It is only in force during the legal separation process and will be replaced by a final order of alimony.
    • Transitional alimony. This type of support is mainly short term and applies when the recipient has the capacity to become self-sufficient but requires support while making the adjustment to the economic conditions outside of the marriage. This may include time necessary to obtain educational training.[3] Other states consider support to help obtain an education as “rehabilitative support.”
    • Compensatory alimony. Though less common, this type of support includes situations where one party made significant contributions to the other party’s overall earning potential.[4] Compensatory spousal support may also be awarded when the dissolution of the marriage leads to one party receiving much more in value without any other property available to offset it for the other party.[5] It is sometimes called “reimbursement” alimony.[6]
    • Long-term maintenance. Here, the court usually examines whether the recipient would be unable to reasonably maintain the long-term standard of living established in the marriage on his or her own. If transitional or rehabilitative support alone would not give the recipient the capacity to do so, maintenance support may be awarded.[7] This form of support often receives different names in different states. In Tennessee, for example, this type is called alimony in futuro. It is called maintenance support in Oregon.[8]
    • Many states also allow the judge to award more than one type of support at the dissolution of a single marriage. This can lead to the recipient receiving more in the initial months or years after the divorce, and less or none in the long term.
  3. Step 3 Understand how support is calculated.
    Alimony is determined by a judge according to state law. Sometimes, states have a statute that lays out a formula used to determine alimony. To see if this is the case, type “alimony” and then your state in a web browser and look for the statute. More typically, state statutes will list factors that a judge will consider when calculating alimony. These factors include: [9]
    • The length of the marriage. In some states, as in California, a judge may not set an end date for alimony if the couple has been married over 10 years.[10]
    • The income of each spouse (and future earning potential). A significant earning disparity is likely to lead to maintenance support, or spousal support that helps to maintain the standard of living established during the marriage.[11]
    • The age and health of each spouse. Alimony awards tend to increase with the age of the spouse.
    • The standard of living during the marriage. The marital standard of living is defined as the financial status of a married couple immediately prior to divorce. The amount of alimony awarded should allow each spouse to maintain the same quality of life as under the marital standard of living.[12]
    • Whether one spouse made significant contributions to the education or career of the other during the marriage. For example, if one spouse stayed home with children while the other worked, this allowed the other spouse to invest in his/her career and increase his/her earning power. Such a condition might be taken into consideration in an alimony decision.[13]
    • The assets and debts of each party following the divorce.
    • Domestic violence.[14]
    • The tax impact of alimony.[15]
  4. Step 4 Understand the tax consequences.
    Before seeking alimony, you should meet with a tax professional to discuss the tax implications of receiving alimony. If you receive alimony, it will count as general income.[16] However, the paying spouse will not withhold taxes, so you will need to plan to make tax payments.[17]
    • The spouse paying maintenance typically can deduct payments on a federal tax return, however there are complicated hurdles you must clear before being able to claim the deduction.[18] You should certainly meet with an accountant or tax professional.
    • You should read IRS publication 504 for more information on what you must do to assure that your alimony payments are tax deductible.[19]
    • Whether or not payments are deductible on your state taxes will be determined by state law, which varies.[20]
  5. Step 5 Meet with an attorney.
    You might want to meet with a lawyer and talk about your situation. Alimony determinations can be complicated, and an effective advocate could increase the likelihood that you will be awarded support.
    • To find an experienced family law attorney, you should visit the website for your state’s bar association. Bar associations typically run a referral service and can give you the names of many qualified attorneys.
    • Be aware that many lawyers now offer “limited scope representation” service. This means that the attorney will help you with discrete tasks for a flat fee. For example, you could ask an attorney to complete a petition for you, or you could receive coaching on how to prepare for your hearing.
  6. Step 6 Negotiate an agreement for spousal support.
    You have the option of negotiating with your ex-spouse for alimony. Negotiating a spousal partner agreement may provide more flexibly than you could get from a court order. You should look at the factors that a judge will consider in your state, since alimony agreements must nevertheless be approved by a judge.[21]
    • Both spouses should sign the agreement.
    • After signing the agreement, get the judge’s signature. You can do this by taking it to the court clerk and dropping it off. After the judge signs off on the agreement, you can then file it with the court clerk. The clerk will stamp your copies as filed.
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Part 2
Part 2 of 4:

Filing for Alimony

  1. Step 1 Separate from your spouse.
    To get alimony, you first need to separate from your spouse. You may begin to receive temporary alimony provided there is some physical separation, either because you are going through a divorce, have a restraining order, or for some other reason.[22]
    • If you are filing for a restraining order because of domestic violence, then you can request alimony at that time.
  2. Step 2 Gather necessary financial information.
    When petitioning the court for alimony, you will need to present proof of your financial situation. Accordingly, you should gather documents that show how much money you make, the current value of your assets, and your monthly living expenses. At a minimum, you will need:
    • pay stubs
    • bank statements
    • statements showing the current cash value of retirement accounts and life insurance proceeds
    • proof of mortgage payments or rent
    • proof of health care expenses
  3. Step 3 Locate the appropriate court.
    Alimony is most often requested as part of a divorce. In fact, some states will prohibit your seeking alimony after a divorce has been granted. Iowa, for example, requires that you request alimony during the divorce proceeding. You will file for alimony in the court for the county where you and your spouse live.
    • If you are seeking temporary alimony for a separation, you will also file in the court for the county where you live.
  4. Step 4 Find the forms.
    Most states provide prepared "fill in the blank" forms for family law cases. These forms can usually be found on the website for your local court or the state's Supreme Court. Requests for alimony will usually be included in a petition for divorce. You may need a couple forms:
    • A “Request for Order” or “Petition for Spousal Support.” This form tells the court that you are seeking alimony. In some states, you simply use a blank “Motion” form, but will check off a box for “spousal support.”
    • Income worksheets. Typically, you will have to fill out some kind of worksheet on which you list your employment and other financial information. This form can go by a variety of names, such as “Income and Expense Declaration” or “Financial Affidavit.” Ask your court clerk for the form.
  5. Step 5 Fill out the forms.
    Your petition/request for order form will require various information about you and your spouse. If you need help finding or filling out the forms, you should check if your court has a self-help center or a family law facilitator. These places employ people who can answer legal questions and look over your forms to check that they were filled out correctly.
    • Your financial worksheet will typically ask for: your employer’s name and contact information, your length of employment, your age and education, other forms of support (such as disability, child support, and workers’ compensation), investment income, and income from self-employment. It will also ask information about financial assets, such as cash and checking accounts, stocks and bonds, and real estate. You will also have to provide itemized monthly expenses.[23]
    • It is a good idea to have your forms looked over by an attorney or by someone who works in the self-help center at the court.
  6. Step 6 Prepare for filing.
    Once the appropriate forms have been completed, you must sign them. Any forms that have a notary block on them will need to be signed in front of a notary. Make several copies of every document.
  7. Step 7 File your documents.
    Give the original set of documents to the clerk of court. A filing fee will be charged unless you apply and qualify for a fee waiver. Filing fees range widely. In Massachusetts, it costs $100 to file.[24] In Las Vegas, Nevada the fee is $259.00, whereas South Carolina courts charge $150.00.[25] You can ask the clerk to stamp all of your copies with the filing date.
    • You will also need a summons or citation from the clerk, who will print it off and sign it. The summons serves as notice to the other party that they are being sued.[26]
  8. Step 8 Serve your spouse.
    You must give your spouse notice of the divorce/alimony petition. If you sign a joint petition for divorce, then you will not have to give notice. Ask the clerk what methods of service are acceptable. Typically, you cannot serve the papers yourself.
    • Service by sheriff. Often you can have the sheriff serve the papers. You will have to pay a small fee for this service but can generally arrange it with the court clerk. The sheriff will fill out and sign an Affidavit of Service and mail it to you. This form attests that service was made. You then need to file it with the court clerk.
    • Service by process server. You can hire a professional process server to serve the papers. They cost between $45-75.[27] Like the sheriff, the process server fills out an Affidavit of Service and returns it to you.
    • Service by a third party. Often you can have someone 18 or older deliver the papers, provided this person is not a relative or a party to the case. You should give this person the Affidavit of Service to fill out.
    • Service by mail. Some courts will allow service by mail. Send the documents certified mail, return receipt requested, restricted delivery to the ex-spouse. You will then fill out the Affidavit of Service and file it.[28]
  9. Step 9 Wait for the answer from your spouse.
    After being served, you spouse has a set number of days in order to respond. This amount of time varies by state, but typically runs between 21-30 days. In the answer, your spouse will probably deny that they owe spousal maintenance.
    • If your spouse does not respond, then you could move for a Default Judgment. The court will be limited to ordering only the relief asked for in the complaint. After the deadline for receiving an answer has passed, you can fill out a judgment form and submit it to the court through the clerk. Once the judge signs the default judgment, you can then serve it on your spouse.[29]
  10. Step 10 Get your hearing date.
    You may be given a hearing date when you file,[30] or one may be mailed to you. Ask the clerk when you file your petition when you will be contacted about a hearing date.
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Part 3
Part 3 of 4:

Getting a Court Award for Alimony

  1. Step 1 Prepare for the hearing.
    At the hearing, you may need to explain to the judge why you need spousal support. You should prepare a short (1-2 minutes) speech, hitting the main reasons you need support. Spousal support hearings are often short (around 10-15 minutes), so you should not expect to get a lot of time to talk.
    • You should base your argument on the factors that your state considers when awarding alimony. If you are sick or elderly, then you should argue that your physical condition will make working difficult. Similarly, you can mention the sacrifices you made to help advance your spouse’s career to the detriment of your own.
  2. Step 2 Attend the hearing.
    At the hearing, the judge will ask you and your spouse questions. The judge will already have received and looked at your financial affidavits, so he or she will have some idea of the amount of support to award, if any. The judge will ask questions to clarify anything that is unclear.
    • Arrive early. You should give yourself plenty of time to find parking and then the correct courtroom.
  3. Step 3 Prepare an order.
    If you win spousal support, then you will need to prepare an order. You will need to do this immediately. Often, the court will have blank order forms for you to fill out. Sometimes, you need to print off a form from the court’s website and then complete it in court.
    • On the blank order form, you will need to put basic information such as the date and the courtroom where the case was heard, as well as the name of the judge and the names of the parties.
    • You then must include the spousal support terms that the judge orders.
    • If you have a lawyer, your lawyer can handle this for you.
  4. Step 4 Copy the order.
    You must make copies of the order and then send a copy to your ex-spouse to review. If he or she has no objections, the order will be returned to you. Once returned, you need to file it with the court for the judge to review and sign off on.
    • Once the order is signed, you should pick up a copy. You may be responsible for distributing a copy to your ex-spouse.
  5. Step 5 Facilitate payment.
    The judge will state when the alimony starts and the manner of payment (if the two parties have not reached an agreement already). You may need to provide your ex with your bank routing number, if money is to be directly deposited.
    • In some states, your ex-spouse will send alimony payments to a state agency, which will then disburse the payments to you. This is the case in Florida.
  6. Step 6 Understand when the alimony ends.
    If the alimony is not for a finite amount of time, it could be paid indefinitely. However, alimony payments will cease when:[31]
    • You reach the date set by the judge for cessation of alimony payments.
    • The spouse receiving alimony remarries or enters into a domestic partnership.
    • Your children no longer need a full-time parent at home.
    • A judge decides that the partner receiving alimony has not made a sufficient effort to become at least partially self-supporting.
    • A significant life event (e.g., retirement) occurs and the judge decides to modify alimony payments.
    • One party dies.
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Part 4
Part 4 of 4:

Enforcing an Alimony Order

  1. Step 1 Contact your ex-spouse if payments stop.
    In some cases, your ex may temporarily stop making payments due to uncontrollable circumstances, such as losing a job or a medical emergency. If you want to, you can negotiate an agreement with your ex to reduce or suspend the alimony payments until a future date.[32]
    • If you do not come to an agreement, your ex is still responsible to pay the full amount of support unless she or he seeks temporary relief from the court.[33]
  2. Step 2 Sue in court.
    If nothing else has worked, you can file a lawsuit against your ex in small claims court (if the amount owed is beneath a state-determined limit) or in higher court (if the amount exceeds the small claims limit).
    • This is an unusual procedure, and should be a means of last resort.[34]
  3. Step 3 File a contempt motion.
    If your ex-spouse refuses to pay court-ordered spousal support, then you need to seek a contempt order. The court has several ways to enforce spousal support:
    • In some states, if your ex-spouse stops paying alimony, you can ask the court to hold him or her in contempt (or issue an “earnings assignment order” to garnish wages).[35] This may provide incentives for your ex to pay what is owed, such as threatening the possibility of jail time.
    • If your ex-spouse fails to make alimony payments, you can request permission from the court to take the asset as payment, or force your ex to sell the property and pay what you are owed with the proceeds.[36]
    • A “Qualified Domestic Relations Order” (QRDO) may also be issued. This order will entitle you to part of your ex-spouse’s retirement plans, such as 401Ks, 403Bs, and other ERISA plans (not IRAs). In many cases, unpaid alimony can be taken from your ex’s retirement account.[37]
  4. Step 4 Find a motion form.
    There should be a pre-printed “Contempt Motion” form available.[38] It may have a different name, such as “Contempt for Disobedience of an Order for Alimony.”[39] Ask the clerk for the form.
    • Forms will ask for different information, but you should be prepared to list the dates of missed payments and their amounts.[40]
    • Attach a copy of your spousal support order.[41]
    • File it with the court clerk and serve notice on your ex-spouse.[42]
  5. Step 5 Prepare for the hearing.
    Document the amount of your ex-spouse’s total delinquency. Have bank statements ready to show that no alimony has been deposited in the account. Also bring copies of any letters or other forms of communication you have had with your ex or your ex-spouse’s attorney.
  6. Step 6 Attend the hearing.
    At the hearing, you should state that you have not received payment and be prepared to show the judge supporting documentation.
    • You may be questioned as a witness.[43] Some courts allow witness testimony at the hearing, and as someone with knowledge of the case you may be questioned by your ex-spouse.
    • If you prevail, you will have to prepare an order.
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  • State courts typically provide packets of information for those who are divorcing. This packet will include blank forms and instructions for filling them out.
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References

  1. ↑ http://www.mckinleyirvin.com/Family-Law-Blog/2012/February/Are-You-Entitled-to-Spousal-Support-.aspx
  2. ↑ http://www.attorneys.com/spousal-support-alimony-palimony/temporary-spousal-support-versus-alimony/
  3. ↑ https://www.osbar.org/public/legalinfo/1134_ChildSupportDivorce.htm
  4. ↑ https://www.osbar.org/public/legalinfo/1134_ChildSupportDivorce.htm
  5. ↑ https://www.osbar.org/public/legalinfo/1134_ChildSupportDivorce.htm
  6. ↑ http://findlawimages.com/public/pdf/spousalsupport_miniguide.pdf
  7. ↑ https://www.osbar.org/public/legalinfo/1134_ChildSupportDivorce.htm
  8. ↑ https://www.osbar.org/public/legalinfo/1134_ChildSupportDivorce.htm
  9. ↑ http://www.attorneys.com/divorce/how-is-alimony-calculated/
  1. ↑ http://www.courts.ca.gov/1038.htm
  2. ↑ https://www.osbar.org/public/legalinfo/1134_ChildSupportDivorce.htm
  3. ↑ http://www.forbes.com/sites/jefflanders/2013/05/17/what-divorcing-women-need-to-know-about-alimony-reform/
  4. ↑ http://www.forbes.com/sites/jefflanders/2013/05/17/what-divorcing-women-need-to-know-about-alimony-reform/
  5. ↑ http://www.courts.ca.gov/1038.htm
  6. ↑ http://www.courts.ca.gov/1038.htm
  7. ↑ http://www.divorcenet.com/states/pennsylvania/is_alimony_tax_deductible
  8. ↑ http://www.divorcenet.com/states/pennsylvania/is_alimony_tax_deductible
  9. ↑ https://www.key.com/html/alimony-child-support-articles.html
  10. ↑ https://www.key.com/html/alimony-child-support-articles.html
  11. ↑ http://www.businessinsider.com/heres-how-to-lessen-alimonys-financial-sting-2011-10
  12. ↑ http://family.findlaw.com/divorce/settlement-agreements-and-court-approval.html
  13. ↑ http://www.attorneys.com/spousal-support-alimony-palimony/temporary-spousal-support-versus-alimony/
  14. ↑ http://www.courts.ca.gov/documents/fl150.pdf
  15. ↑ http://www.mass.gov/courts/court-info/filing-fees/pfc-fees-gen.html#DomesticRelationsandPaternity
  16. ↑ http://www.judicial.state.sc.us/clerksCourt/fcFileFee.cfm
  17. ↑ http://www.illinoislegalaid.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=home.dsp_content&contentID=6371
  18. ↑ http://www.serve-now.com/about-process-serving
  19. ↑ http://www.tiogacountypa.us/court_of_common_pleas/court_administration/documents/supportcontempt.pdf
  20. ↑ https://www.utcourts.gov/howto/filing/default_judgment/
  21. ↑ http://www.courts.ca.gov/9050.htm
  22. ↑ http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/alimony-what-you-need-know-30081.html
  23. ↑ http://www.divorcenet.com/resources/divorce/spousal-support/enforcement-alimony
  24. ↑ http://www.courts.ca.gov/1251.htm
  25. ↑ http://family-law.freeadvice.com/family-law/spousal_support/alimony-collect.htm
  26. ↑ http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/alimony-what-you-need-know-30081.html
  27. ↑ http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/types-property-liens.html
  28. ↑ http://www.forbes.com/sites/jefflanders/2014/02/19/how-to-get-your-ex-husband-to-honor-the-financial-terms-of-your-divorce-settlement/
  29. ↑ http://www.courtswv.gov/lower-courts/family-forms/FC250.pdf
  30. ↑ http://www.tiogacountypa.us/court_of_common_pleas/court_administration/documents/supportcontempt.pdf
  31. ↑ http://www.courtswv.gov/lower-courts/family-forms/FC250.pdf
  32. ↑ http://www.tiogacountypa.us/court_of_common_pleas/court_administration/documents/supportcontempt.pdf
  33. ↑ http://www.courtswv.gov/lower-courts/family-forms/FC250.pdf
  34. ↑ http://www.courtswv.gov/lower-courts/family-forms/FC250.pdf

About this article

Clinton M. Sandvick, JD, PhD
Co-authored by:
Clinton M. Sandvick, JD, PhD
Doctor of Law, University of Wisconsin-Madison
This article was co-authored by Clinton M. Sandvick, JD, PhD. Clinton M. Sandvick worked as a civil litigator in California for over 7 years. He received his JD from the University of Wisconsin-Madison in 1998 and his PhD in American History from the University of Oregon in 2013. This article has been viewed 10,273 times.
4 votes - 50%
Co-authors: 6
Updated: July 11, 2019
Views: 10,273
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 10,273 times.

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