Reconciled

“If anyone has caused grief, he has not so much grieved me as he has grieved all of you to some extent – not to put it too severely. The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient. Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him. Another reason I wrote you was to see if you would stand the test and be obedient in everything. Anyone you forgive, I also forgive. And what I have forgiven – if there was anything to forgive – I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, in order that Satan might not outwit us. For we are not unaware of his schemes.” – 2 Corinthians 2:5-11

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has gone, the new has come! All this is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to Himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And He has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God. As God’s co-workers we urge you not to receive God’s grace in vain. For He says, ‘In the time of My favor I heard you, and in the day of salvation I helped you.’ I tell you, now is the time of God’s favor, now is the day of salvation.” – 2 Corinthians 5:17-6:2

What does it mean to be reconciled? Reconciliation is often one of those “churchy” words that many don’t truly know the full meaning of. Reconcile, it’s like to forgive, right? Yes, in part, but not fully. Above, in the first passage, it states, “you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him.”

Reconciliation goes beyond forgiving someone you had a dispute with. After you forgive, the verse says to comfort him. Just because you have forgiven them doesn’t mean that the shame and remorse of what they did is gone. No, more times than not, there is still a form of hurt going on inside of them. At the very least, there is probably worry that they may mess up or have a dispute again. They need comfort. Comfort does not mean to support any ungodly or sinful activity that may be going on in the other person’s life. Comfort is exactly what the verse says it is, “reaffirm your love for him.”

Speaking from my own experience, when I wrong someone or am at odds with them, when it comes to the point of reconciling, I don’t worry about the forgiveness; I worry about the after effect. The thoughts bombard my mind: “They don’t love me anymore,” “This relationship has been destroyed,” “They will never trust me again,” “Things will never be the same.” These lingering thoughts take over. The enemy is well practiced at planting these thoughts in my mind.

As hard as it may be at times, trust me I know, we are still called to reconcile and comfort those we are at odds with. They need to know that things will be okay. They need to know that they are loved. Sometimes, they may just need a hug. The fact of the matter is, they need to be comforted and reaffirmed. This step in the reconciliation process will probably take time, possibly even longer than it took to initially forgive, because although you may have forgiven them, you still have reservations and cautions for your protection. You do need to protect yourself. I’m not saying to put yourself in harms way or to place yourself in a position that will cause you and/or the other person to stumble, but you need to allow yourself to be open and vulnerable to them to express that through Christ, you still are able to love them because Christ loves you.

Just as the second passage states, God is the one who started reconciliation through Christ’s sacrifice and not counting our sins against us. It is only because of Him that we are even able to consider reconciling with one another. We are all sinners. We have all fallen short (Romans 3:23). None of us deserve God’s mercy, forgiveness, love, or reconciliation. We deserve death, hell, shame, and torture. But, God is gracious. Right after Paul states that we have all fallen short, he says in Romans 3:24, “and all are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Since God is continuously and relentlessly reconciling us back unto Him, shouldn’t we also be reconciling with one another?

As the second passage from the beginning states, “He has committed to us the message of reconciliation.” Because we are Christians, Christ followers, reflections of Christ, and being made in His likeness, we have been given the message of reconciliation. One way to convey that message is reconciling among each other. We are fellow Christians, yet many of us are divided, hurt, scorned, at odds, and broken by the deeds and actions we have done to one another. We are broken, sinful people. We are going to hurt one another at times, but being followers of Christ, we are able to overcome hurt and pain. We cannot afford to not reconcile with each other. As mentioned in the beginning passage from 2 Corinthians 2, “I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, in order that Satan might not outwit us. For we are not unaware of his schemes.” If we are divided and are not at peace with one another, we have opened the door for Satan to come in and outwit us with his schemes. We know what Satan is capable of and shouldn’t allow for opportunity for him to cause chaos between us. We must reconcile and stay united in Christ. We are many parts to one body. We can’t cut off a limb just because of a disagreement or pain caused among us. No! We work together to heal the wounds we inflict on one another. That means getting over grudges we hold on to. It means to show love to those who wronged you.

Some Christians show forgiveness but then become indifferent with the other person. This indifference becomes a way of acting as if the other person isn’t there. When you become indifferent, you don’t care if they are stumbling or sinning. You don’t care if they are doing well and overcoming. Being indifferent shows a subtle form of hatred within you because you couldn’t care less how the other person is. Love is absent. Therefore, to truly reconcile, which we are called to do, we must express love towards the other person. Encourage them. Lift them up. Acknowledge them. Don’t give up on them. If we can’t reconcile with one another as fellow believers, how are we supposed to convey the message of the Gospel and be the ambassadors of reconciliation we are called to be to the lost souls of the world?

As ministers of reconciliation we are to bring to the lost the message that Christ has placed in us. “God SO loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His Son to condemn the world, but to save it,” (John 3:16-17). “This righteousness is given through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus,” (Romans 3:22-24). We take this message and not only proclaim, but live it out as well. We love on the unloveable. We mend broken relationships. We give until we cannot give anymore. We invest in people and disciple them when they are saved. We reconcile the lost by revealing to them who God is. Lastly, we are to reconcile with one another just as God chose to reconcile us back unto Him despite our broken and sinful nature.