Back in July, when we started Skyward Sword HD, we were oh-so-excited to play. We tweeted photos of our special edition Joy-Cons! An old-school physical copy of the guidebook! And, once we got it, a shot of our Loftwing Amiibo!
But by the time we arrived at the final showdown, we were just plain tired. After all, it had taken us a decade to get there. We started in December of 2011, you see. On the Wii.
And we finished in December of 2021, on a limping-to-the-finish-line Switch.
We’ll offer our thoughts generally about Skyward Sword, then and now, in an upcoming post. This one is dedicated to our dear friend Demise, who has, we are happy to report, finally demised.
We had tried three other times. Granted, the first day we were perhaps one cocktail over the confidence limit and had started the battle more on a lark than with any intent to win; and the second day we were stymied by Demelza’s technological difficulties. That left one day in which, simply put, we tried and failed, rather abysmally, if we do say so ourselves.
Following the third day’s futile attempt, Demelza set about to level the playing field, a cliché that she generally loathes, but in this case we were clearly in the Himalayas of ability and some leveling was necessary.
After Demelza’s whirlwind week of preparations, we had two life medals affording us an extra two hearts, two ordinary extra hearts, two Guardian Potions Plus, one Hearts Plus Plus potion, a Goddess Shield, several pumpkin-fields of rupees, and assorted remaining insects caught by our newly aggrandized bug net.
Moreover, Demelza had prepared spreadsheets and graphs denoting her calculus of the usefulness of potions or items in various scenarios: X being the number of hearts gained swigging a potion, Y being the number of hearts lost when Link pauses to wipe his hand over his mouth after drinking (why? why?), etcetera. After weighing the benefits of carrying our last fairy into battle or swapping it out for something else – Demelza pounding the table and pointing to the result of her maths exercise – we opted to replace the fairy in our pouch with another Guardian Potions Plus. That gave us three, and with the Potions Medal, each Guardian Potions Plus would provide us with nine minutes of invincibility (not to be confused with adroitness). We also had a Hearts Plus Plus potion.
We were, in short, OP, which is (apparently) what the cool gamer kids call Over-Powered. (See also: buff.) Generally, when one is OP, one should expect or even welcome nerfing, which is (also apparently) what cool gamer kids call lowering one’s abilities, because, after all, they want it to be a fair fight.
We find ourselves quite nerf enough without anyone making it worse, thank you very much. You want fair? That’s where you go to see the pigs and sheep.
And so we entered the ring with THREE Guardian Potions Plus and a Hearts Plus Plus, the latter of which, in retrospect, we should have subbed out with another Guardian Plus potion, but Itzal fell asleep during the review of all those spreadsheets – and, anyhow, at this point in the story, as always, we are ahead of ourselves.
At the battle’s start, there’s an amusing cutscene in which Demise ponders how much time it will take to defeat Link (by which he means us). We can report, with authority, that it was just over 27 minutes, nine minutes for each Guardian Potions Plus we carried. The Hearts Plus Plus potion was depleted in short order after that.
Game Over, once.
We rallied, Itzal tried to remember if he’d taken his blood pressure medication, and once more into the fray we went.
Game Over, twice.
We took a break and made a cocktail. Itzal nervously chain-ate potato chips. Demelza worried, albeit silently, that because we’d used a Spiral Charge cheat against Bilocyte, we would never defeat the Demon King, just as we would never get the heart piece from the chandelier in the Lumpy Pumpkin. Itzal wondered, also silently, if he could somehow blame the Oleg Cassini or the adapter or whatever Demelza had done in her week of preparation.
We then returned to the fight.
It all came down to perfectly executing a Fatal Blow. We don’t know what Itzal did differently from the 138 other times he attempted a Fatal Blow, but on the 139th, Demise finally gave up the ghost. It was, to be honest, almost anticlimactic. It just happened, seemingly for no reason. There we were.
Thus, with a decade’s worth of humility, we now offer the following Zelder tips:
- Forget fairies and even Heart potions. Fill whatever bottles you have with the Guardian Potions Plus. One such potion is great, two is better, and three is the OP number you’re looking for. If you have the Potions Medal, include it in your pouch to triple the time of the Guardian Potions. In fact, if you don’t have the Potions Medal, get it. Don’t leave home without it.
- If you’re adept at parrying at precisely the split-second before the enemy would otherwise strike, use your shield in the first half of the battle to shield-bash and stun Demise. In the second half, shield-bashing is of limited utility. At least, that’s what we’ve read. Ourselves, we didn’t do much shield-bashing to speak of in either section.
- Pay attention to your shield’s, umm, health indicator. They break, most of them. And while your Guardian Potions Plus mean the shield isn’t all that necessary, it still sucks when they break.
- When deploying a Skyward Strike, you can charge up your sword at any time there is lightning in the arena – you don’t have to coincide your attempts with Demise’s.
- When your sword is electrified, don’t feel you have to get close to deliver a blow; chances are good that Demise will, at best, strike back and nullify your sword’s energy; worse and more likely, he’ll hit you first. Instead, fling the sword’s energy pulse at him. He may do the same, and the two charges may cancel one another out, but at least you’re even, not sprawled on the arena jittering from shock.
- Don’t attempt a Fatal Blow the first time you receive the prompt, nor the second. Demise simply rises up from the arena floor too quickly. Wait for the third, or the 139th, time as the case may be, to be the charm.
While the credits roll, we recommend celebrating with an aptly-named Demelza’s Demise with a float of champagne. And by all means, wipe your mouth with the back of your hand. You’ve got the time now.